hold on
by gc-rocks2009
Summary: chpt. one: harry is feeling sad and wants to kill himself, has hold on- by good charltoternchpt. two: harry just woke up from a weird dream involving his parents. has thank you mom- by good charlotte.


Summery- Harry is feeling guilty about Sirius's death. It can only take so long before he realizes what he has to do.

-"What am I supposed to do now, Sirius?" lately, Harry had been talking to Sirius and had been expecting a response. It let him down to know that Sirius wouldn't talk to him anymore.

This world this world is gone 

_And you don't have to go_

_Your feeling sad you're feeling lonely _

_And no one seems to care_

_Your mothers gone and your father hits you_

_Its pain you cannot bare_

Finally, after six weeks of talking to himself and sitting in his bedroom, the Dursleys called him down to the living room. "What have I told you about owls, huh? I said no ruddy owls. At least you could open your door or window so they could come in and get to you." He was trying to be good so that mad-eye and Mr. Weasley didn't come after him, "here is the letter it was trying to get to you. Mind you, I don't like touching those things to just leave your window open unless it's raining."

"Okay, Uncle Vernon." Harry sighed. He looked at the letter figuring it was his supply list and realized that it was his o.w.l's. He opened the package thinking at least Sirius would be proud of him to see that he had only gotten 3 o.w.l's, just like the Weasley twins. Under the first letter was a letter from Ron, his best friend.

**Dear Harry,**

**How are you doing, I hope your feeling better than the last letter I sent you. Hermione is here and she wanted me to write you again and tell you that no matter what, you can always come to us for help, and don't do anything rash. We miss you!**

**Hang in there,**

**Ron and Hermione**

**(P.s mom wants you to come stay for a while, maybe for the rest of the summer.)**

But we all bleed the same way as you do 

_And we all have the same things to go through_

_Hold on if you feel like letting go_

_Hold on it gets better than you'll know_

He ripped up the note and started screaming. "YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT I AM FEELING. YOU BOTH HAVE PARENTS. WHAT THE HEL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING SENDING ME A LETTER LIKE THAT? WHAT THE HELL IS YOUR PROBLEM?" he dropped down to the floor pretty much crying. He didn't know what to do. He felt like the only way out was to go be with Sirius, and his parents. He wanted to just end it there. There was no point just living like this. He didn't sleep at night didn't wake during the day, just lied on his bed staring at the walls.

_Your days, you say their way to long_

_And your nights, you can't sleep at all_

_Hold on_

_You're not sure what you're waiting for _

_But you don't want any more_

_You're not sure what you're looking for_

_But you don't want no more_

Uncle Vernon called up the stairs, "Harry, are you alright? Is there anything I can get you? I understand how you are feeling, but Harry just remember we are here if you want to talk to us, we know what you are going through."

_But we all bleed the same way as you do_

_And we all have the same things to go through_

_Hold on if you feel like letting go _

_Hold on it gets better than you'll know_

He'd been thinking about it ever since the final fight. Even though it wasn't really the final one that is what he decided to call it. What if he used a time turner of a potion or something to go back in time? If he could do that then everything would be worth it. Everyone would still know about Voldemort and Sirius would still be alive. There would have to be another way.

_Don't stop looking your one step closer_

_Don't stop searching its not over_

_Hold on_

He was thinking about Ron's letter and if Ron knew anything he would come and get him. He would care a little more than just sending a letter saying to not do anything rash. He knew those were Sirius's words exactly, so why did he say them. Why would he torture Harry like that? How could anyone do that to his or her best friend? How?

_What are you looking for?_

_What are you waiting for?_

_Do you know what you're doing to me?_


End file.
